Although his eldest son had rebelled against him King David mourned his death deeply. How often does it happen in families that although there is conflict and hurt and people may not speak to each other for years, when someone dies there is still deep grieving. Could there be some inherent guilt over the break-down of the relationship or is this natural in the process of grieving the particular intimate relationships in families? Having given life a degree of intimacy and attachment remains even if there is breakdown.
Absalom was killed by Joab after his hair was caught fast in a tree. On hearing of the death the king was deeply moved and went to the chamber and wept, “O my son Absalom, Would I had died instead of you.” The people heard that the king was grieving and they stole into the city as people who are ashamed when they flee in battle. 2 Samuel 18.
Pope Francis. At times family life is challenged by the death of a loved one. We cannot fail to offer the light of faith as a support to families going through this experience. AL:253