MARFAM is entering its 15th year; it has been promoting the cause of family life since 1994.  Your financial support helps us to operate, produce the publications, including this monthly enewsletter and maintain our website. Advertise your company or project on the website, enewsletter or various publications or send a donation to P.O. Box 2881, Randburg 2125. South Africa.  Every Rand, Dollar or Euro helps to strengthen families somewhere, somehow. THIS CHRISTMAS why not consider sending us a cheque or begin to make a small monthly donation into our bank account. Contact us for details.

Been there, done that, got the TShirt! What Tshirt will you be wearing over the next few months? T shirts are a kind of symbol of belonging, to a group, at a time, on an occasion.  I wear my World Meeting of Families TShirt when I am presenting a workshop or giving a talk but would not be wearing my JPII praying the Rosary TShirt that I got in the Philippines some years ago walking down the street in Randburg.  Why not?   Some people of course don’t have a variety of shirts to choose from but I believe that most of us will choose a shirt to match an occasion, a sporting event or a show of solidarity or even showing off a designer T.   Imagine going to an ANC rally wearing an IFP or DA shirt. Or vice versa.  Would you be safe?  The election facing us in less than two months is a call to face up to the issues in our country and how the future is likely to be played out. There doesn’t seem to be much to choose between parties when looking at their election manifestos.  Everyone intends to fight crime and corruption and poverty but what will delivery be like and how effective will the official opposition be in holding the ruling party in government to account?   But it is not only government that has to be held accountable. As always the responsibility devolves on us too, in our families and everywhere else.
Two letters from our Church leaders that have been issued recently can be seen to be of particular relevance right now.  One is on Catholic education, the other on the elections and excerpts from both are given below. Both call for responsibility, for mature decision-making and a concern for the future, which are of course issues of concern for families. 
But what role does the Church really play in our decision-making?   We all know that Catholic schools could be a good thing for Catholic children but less than half of children in Catholic schools are Catholics and 99% of Catholic children attend other schools, state or private, so it is not only a question of costs.  We know the strengths and weaknesses of the present government, we are all concerned with corruption and crime but on what do we base our decisions to support party X and not Y?   It might be tradition or background, e.g. my family has always supported the ANC.  It might be group pressure or convincing campaigning.  It might be conviction on moral issues.
People vote with their feet and show their allegiances through the T shirt they wear but it is still perfectly possible to wear the Tshirt and cap and shout the slogans and make your mark for quite another party. And when it comes to Church matters, on Catholics schools and beyond do we really proudly wear our Tshirt? And is the Rosary around the neck a symbol of committed Catholicism or a somewhat superstitious talisman against harm worn by just anyone?  A street vendor is even selling rosaries on Main street in Randburg.
With the family life theme for 2009 of growth, the March theme is “Managing Growth.”   The season of Lent, SA Human Rights Day on 21st March and the issues facing us around this time provide plenty of food for serious reflection on how to manage our personal and our family growth. The MARFAM Lenten  reflection and sharing booklet “Teaching the Way of Love” uses principles of Catholic Social Teaching such as dignity, solidarity, peace and justice in a family context. It provides a tool for individuals, families and groups.  In families, especially with older children an opportunity exists to share and discuss aspects of the election. The school issue could be discussed with those approaching high school and even with young children rights and wrongs and fairness and justice are good topics to address. 
And I think I will take out my TShirt that says, “The Christian Family, Good News for the New Millennium.”  After all we’re still in the first decade and we can still make a difference.        

“Teaching the Way of Love” is a booklet produced at this time of Lent and Easter but not only for use around this time.  Ten reflections use ten principles of Catholic Social Teaching illustrated with family stories and using the SEE – JUDGE – ACT  or Pastoral Cycle method offer food for reflection, Scripture sharing, discussion and prayer at home or in groups.  Cost R10.  A pull-out section contains a Famiy Lenten Calendar.
Stations of the Cross for Families  are available in English @ R8. Zulu, Sotho and Tswana @ R4. 
Stations of the Cross for Widowed People are in English, Zulu and Tswana and cost R4.  For other MARFAM publications see the website www.marfam.org.za.   Also on the website www.marfam.org.za is the March article from Marriage Marriage and Family Living  about democracy, a poem for the 1st Sunday of Lent and the monthly reflections in English.  

2009 FAMILY LIFE THEME “MARRIAGE AND FAMILY GROWING TOGETHER”
INTRODUCTION
One of the most important features of family life is that it is a changing, developing system, growing, and shrinking constantly as members grow older, leave and new members are added to the nuclear and extended family. This can vary vastly as each family is unique, made up of unique individuals in unique relationships. Although families are still considered the basic building blocks of society, forms of families are changing and challenges facing them today are greater than ever before. Commitment and skills are required for a family to function optimally over time.  
The Catholic Church teaches us that a sacramental marriage is the ideal foundation for a family but many families, even within the Church, are not built around the Sacrament of Matrimony. 
The Sunday readings of weeks 21 to 27 of this year of Mark, year B in the liturgical cycle, are suitable for deeper reflection on marriage. It is suggested that communities could use this time to focus on marriage from different perspectives and end with a MARRIAGE DAY celebration on 27th Sunday, 4 October. Special resource materials will be provided by the SACBC Family Life Desk as was done in 2006 and 2003.

Brief reflections for the Sundays and main feastdays of the month are posted on www.marfam.org.za and can be downloaded.  Translations in Sotho, Pedi and Tswana are available by email.  We are hoping to have Afrikaans, Zulu and Xhosa translations soon.  Anyone willing and able to help with this can contact Toni at Toni@marfam.org.za

PARISH FAMILY MINISTRY
There is a busy time ahead for this project at the moment. Workshops planned:  Weekend of 28 February in Oudtshoorn diocese,  13-15 March in the Kimberley Diocese and 3-5 July in Johannesburg.  There will also be a workshop mainly for those already involved in Johannesburg on 28th March.  Apart from that parish visits are planned to a number of places.  Would you like a visit to your parish?  Contact Toni to book.

CPLO  ROUND TABLE  ON SA NEW CHILDREN’S ACT
Dear Friends
‘Early Childhood Development (ECD) Programmes and Services constitute an underlying theme of the new legislation regarding children and are necessary for its success.’

The new Children’s Act and its Amendment seek to fundamentally transform the nature and provision of services to children;
to protect children from harm caused by exploitation, neglect and abuse;
to promote the right to survive, to be safe, and to belong and to develop;
to identify vulnerable children;
to ensure that children receive their constitutional entitlements;
and to provide a spread of services to address the many vulnerabilities of children.

How does ECD contribute to the realization of these objectives?    Those interested and involved in provision of services to young children are invited to a Roundtable Discussion dealing with the above, hosted by the SACBC Parliamentary Liaison Office and the SACBC Family Life Desk. 
When:  Tuesday 10 March
Where:  Mazenod Centre (Lumko)  Germiston.
For more information contact the CPLO  @ 021 461 1417 or info@cplo.org.za or Toni Rowland @ 011 789 5449 or homefun@icon.co.za


CATHOLIC SOCIAL TEACHING has been employed in a number of current statements. 
OUR BISHOPS SPEAK
Extracts from letter on Catholic Education
Care, concern, and challenge for Catholic Education
Addressing the Catholic Community, Catholic Schools, Educators, Learners, Supporter and Beneficiaries of Catholic Education.the bishops express deep appreciation for the work people are doing in Catholic schools.
”Schooling has been, and remains, an important part of the mission of the Church. Our schools strive to help everyone, rich and poor, to grow in faith and to integrate faith with experience. Inspired by the gospel, Catholic schools respect the freedom and dignity of every human being and develop the qualities of personal integrity, moral courage and social responsibility that are marks of authentic Christian personality.  Religious Education programmes in Catholic schools set them apart from other schools. They are based on the gospel and on sound educational principles. We need to ensure that prayer and liturgy remain central in the life of our schools.”
Teachers participate in the teaching ministry of Jesus and are called to prepare their learners to be active and responsible members of society who have purpose and meaning in life and who are capable of being agents of social change.
It is no longer possible to depend on overseas funding and we have to take on the responsibility for them.
”We call on all members of the Catholic community to value our schools, and encourage Catholic parents to send their children to Catholic schools. We urge parents to be actively involved in school life, particularly in governing bodies. Parents play a central role in supporting and promoting the vision of education on which our schools are founded. Parishes are natural homes for Catholic schools and we need to re-establish closer links between priests and school communities where the links have been lost.
We are mindful that most Catholic children are not in Catholic schools, and we encourage both teachers and pupils to witness to the values of our faith in the public school system. We need to explore new ways of establishing schools in the future to meet the educational needs of Catholics. We invite those Catholics who have chosen the teaching profession to consider seriously the option of working in Catholic schools.”
May God bless our schools so that they may be places of hope.”
Archbishop Buti Tlhagale OMI

EXTRACTS FROM SACBC COMMUNICATION ON THE SA ELECTION ON 22 APRIL 2009
“Awake! Awake!  Protect our Democracy!”
A number of resources including reflections for small groups have been produced which can be downloaded from www.sacbc.org.za  the SACBC website.  The Justice and Peace Departments at the SACBC and in dioceses are also assisting too with voter education.
Extract from the Pastoral letter.
“….. Outstanding Challenges
As a nation we have made many advances over the past years. We thank God for the wise and selfless leaders that have helped us to achieve this, and for the goodwill shown by so many of our people. Yet we all remain concerned about the enormous challenges that still face us. We know that there will be no easy solutions to the problems of:

• Poverty, the growing gap between rich and poor, rising prices and the lack of jobs;
• The lack of adequate housing, public services and service delivery;
• Unstable families, increasing domestic violence and teenage pregnancies;
• Sexual exploitation and alcohol and drug abuse;
• Increasing instances of abortion;
• The high levels of crime and violence, and a justice system that is slow and often ineffective;
• The weakening of organs of society which should be strengthening our democracy (such as the SABC and the courts of law);
• The increase in HIV&AIDS and the plight of vulnerable children;
• The low quality of public education; and
• The influx of migrants and refugees and the associated xenophobia.

These and many other problems are a serious challenge to any government, and it is up to each one of us to decide which party has the policies and commitment to address them effectively. It is important to judge a party on its overall policy regarding the key values of the Gospel such as promoting life, human dignity and justice in relation to the above issues. “
The letter goes on describing what we should guard against

• Blind loyalty to a party.
• Intolerance and Intimidation of those who hold different political views.
• Corruption that delays service delivery and disillusions so many people
• Doing nothing – creating a dependency and allowing those in authority to do as they please without challenge

Our role as Christians is to promote Catholic Social Teaching, be conscious of the needs of the poor and marginalized, promote family values and respect for the Rule of Law.   We need to pray and let our prayer lead us to action to use our vote wisely.

Other pastoral letters on the annual LENTEN APPEAL, THE CRISIS IN ZIMBABWE and on HUMAN TRAFFICKING  have also been issued recently. See the SACBC website. www.sacbc.org.za

A ZENIT report too employs Catholic Social Teaching. 
Cardinal calls poverty a moral problem.
Poverty is a problem posed to humanity's moral conscience, and cannot be explained solely from the material point of view, says the president of the Pontifical Council for Justice and Peace.
Cardinal Martino stressed the moral "knots" in which poverty is tied up at present, which the Pope highlighted in his message: abortion, the fight against AIDS, children, disarmament and the food crisis. The promotion of abortion in poor countries is "the most unjust of the many expressions of that dissimulated and malevolent strategy of wanting to overcome poverty by eliminating the poor."  It is a "dangerous strategy," he said, which consists in "using authority to lessen the number of guests rather than multiplying the bread to be shared."
Addressing the present economic crisis, the cardinal clarified once again that it is "an ethical problem," and that it is necessary to change "the mentality that reigns in financial activities, all based on self-reference and short-term gain," and to place it in "the perspective of the common good."
He emphasized the importance of putting the person at the center of the economy. He affirmed, "The problems of development, aid and international cooperation are often resolved without really involving people, but only as questions of predisposition of mechanisms, of specifying tariff agreements, of accreditation of anonymous financing, while, on the contrary, the struggle against poverty needs men and women who live fraternity profoundly, who are able to support individuals, families and communities in endeavors of genuine human development."
He added: "The light of the truth of man, created by God and redeemed by Christ, is an answer to one of the greatest weaknesses of contemporary society: the inadequate vision of man." This vision, he said, "must differentiate a Catholic NGO from those nongovernmental organizations that are also dedicated to the struggle against extreme poverty and hunger."

ONGOING ADULT FORMATION is seen as a priority not only in the Church in South Africa.
INVITATIONS FOR FURTHER STUDY AT ACADEMIC LEVEL
1. INTAMS Colloquium
Dear colleagues, students, collaborators and friends,
The INTAMS Chair for Marriage & Spirituality at the Theology Faculty of the Catholic University Leuven, Belgium, will be holding its 2009 annual INTAMS Colloquium in Leuven on the theme :  "More Than Just Being Together"  Sacred and Secular Symbols of Marriage. www.intams.org/events-col09.htm.

2. Master's in Leadership for Family Ministry and Faith Development at the Dominican University near Chicago, US.   
The program is a hybrid, forming a 3-year cohort of students that accompany each other in their time in the program. There are three summer intensives, each lasting 9 days, and three online courses each year that are consecutive, one in fall, one beginning in January and the last in March. This schedule makes it very accessible to anyone who works full-time, as only a week's vacation is required in June, and courses are taken one at a time. Of course "accessible" is quite different when one is coming from Africa!
Kathy Heskin, Director, Master of Leadership in Family Ministry. www.dom.edu/academics/slcs/programs/mlfm.

3. St Augustine College, Johannesburg South Africa.
Through the School of Theology, School of Philosophy, Commerce and Applied Ethics and the School of Humanities and Education offers a range of post-graduate degrees and more recent a B Com with a difference.  
There are also regular public lectures on relevant church-related topics.
Visit www.staugustine.ac.za  or call 011 782 4616

4. The SACBC DEPARTMENT FOR EVANGELISATION  in conjunction with the Family Life Desk offers various types of workshops as a form of ongoing adult formation.  Contact me Toni or Fr Barney McAleer of the Department for Evangelisation. 

HEARTLINES
Heartlines a South African Mass Media initiative has launched 6 Weeks of values in action: Do Good for change with a preview of the first episode of the series Hopeville to be screened on SACBC2.  The series will run from 3rd March and in addition to the films there is a song and teaching aids too are available.  
“We trust that you and your church members are praying and preparing for this period as an unprecedented opportunity for Christians to live out our faith in a real and tangible way. During these 6 weeks, Heartlines aims to help people live differently, and make choices that can affect the world around us, for good, and for God. While we encourage everyone to continue to live out good values even after the 6 weeks, there is something special about focusing our efforts during a short time period to create momentum and allow good to ‘ripple’ throughout our communities.”  For more on HEARTLINES  visit www.heartlines.org.za
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:9)

CORRESPONDENCE
Viva the Knights of Da Gama in East London!.  As part of their “action” in their parish Renew programme they are supporting children who attend catechism but whose families do not take them to Mass by supplying them with the Family Life Calendars and reflections to use at home.   Who has other ideas to share?

A SIMPLE GUIDE TO SOUTH AFRICAN FAMILY LAW
The book has been endorsed by Judge Belinda Van Heerdeen of the Supreme court of Appeal, who has also written the foreword. The book is published by Siber Ink publishers and it contains the family law as at November 2008.  More information on www.siberink.co.za; or call Nthabiseng 083 674 8236 or Mpumi 0734215203.”

SOME VAGUELY APPROPRIATE LENTEN HUMOUR 
The local parish had a fairly new priest. He had wonderful, innovative ideas that were, for the most part accepted by the congregation.    His mentor - a "higher ranking" priest came for a visit - to see how he was doing. After looking the parish over, the senior priest said, "Father John, your idea of a drive-through confessional is wonderful. That makes it so convenient for your church members.
"And, Father John, it was a really good idea to have the confessional open 24 hours a day, for those who work "shift" work.  However, Father John... that flashing neon sign that says "TOOT and TELL or GO to HELL" ... well, it has got to go!!"

The church steeple in Port Gibson is very high and was being painted on a rather hot day. The painter was about half way down and, as the steeple was widening out, was taking more paint. The painter felt that he might not have enough paint to finish. Since he was hot and tired, and did not care to make another trip to the ground, he decided to stretch the amount of paint by adding some paint thinner to it. When finished, he lowered himself to the ground and went about cleaning up. Then he looked up to see the results of his work and noted that the area with the thinned paint looked decidedly different. He was pondering about what to do about it when the sky turned dark and there was a lightning flash and loud thunderclap. Then in a loud, booming voice from the sky came the words, " REPAINT AND THIN NO MORE!"

“How will you spend eternity?  Smoking or Non-smoking?"

"Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives."

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Contact Marfam

Tel: +27 11 789 5449
Fax: +27 11 789 5449
Email: info@marfam.org.za
Web:
www.marfam.org.za