As his birthday was coming closer he experienced the usual increasing sense of excitement, but anxiety too. He’d invited the whole world to celebrate with him, but would they come? People seemed to have got into the habit of celebrating his birthday without him. Admittedly there was goodwill. They bought presents. They’d send a card, or email a greeting – often ready-made, downloaded from bluemountain.com or some other site, ones that pass from your inbox to your deleted items and that you can’t even print out and keep looking at. But they even used the occasion of his birthday to have a party of their own. That’s what really got to him.
“It not just a party, it’s my birthday,” he complained to his mother.
Mary sighed, “Never mind, son.  They’re getting into the spirit of it and you’re always going about “the spirit.” You agree there’s a lot of caring and sharing going on in small ways in families, homes and workplaces. Even at global, international level they’re concerned about fair trade, justice and universal peace.”
“Fat lot of good that seems to be doing, I must say,” Jesus retorted.  “But in a way you’re right I suppose. Here and there people are becoming more aware, more concerned. They’re doing things about AIDS, like caring for orphans and even if it is knitting jerseys. Some even shaved their heads for cancer awareness or made speeches about abuse of women and children during those 16 days of activism against women and child abuse in South Africa. I know that there are also many people who themselves are lonely and miserable and not at all in party mood. What I really mean is I want to share with each of them my love, my joy, my peace – a peace the world cannot give.” 
May God be with you and all your families through this season and on into 2006.
Toni Rowland

2006 MARRIAGE AND FAMILY A TOWER OF STRENGTH

To get into “the spirit” of the marriage awareness project in good time the No 1 issue for 2006 of the quarterly magazine Marriage and Family Living, will be out soon.  The January theme of Marriage Preparation should not be neglected in the confusion of starting a new year, at work and school. As outlined by John Paul II in Familiaris Consortio,( the 25th anniversary of which will be celebrated in 2006)marriage preparation begins at home from the children’s earliest days as it is modeled there and amongst their friends and teachers.  Cost of magazine R7.50.
An article on the process of marriage preparation will be posted on the website. Other current and relevant publications are listed there too. 2006 calendars are still available. Cost 100 for R300, 30 for R100. R5,00 each. Plus postage.  

SA CATHOLIC BISHOPS CONFERENCE FAMILY LIFE DESK NEWS

As mentioned above the 2006 marriage project is off the ground if not yet in full flight. A range of resource materials is available and some are published on the website www.marfam.org.za.  The  project outline details many suggestions, even simple ones.  Dioceses, parishes and groups are encouraged to use this opportunity to highlight the important area of marriage. Book with the Family Life Desk to run workshops, seminars or retreats or consult with us about other available resources.  

The initial programme from 1-9th July 2006 consists of

• International Fair for the Families – for NGOs and business to display their materials.
• International Theological and Pastoral Congress
• Rosary for the Families
• Eucharisticc celebrations for linguistic groups
• Festival meeting with testimonies of families
• Concluding Mass presided over by the Pope.   

For full available details visit www.wmf2006.org
A 9 part catechesis has been prepared by the Pontifical Council for the Family and can be downloaded from the website for use in communities, groups and families.  It is a powerful tool for education and inspiration around the beauty and value of marriage and family in our present society.
I was blessed to have been able to attend two of the previous World Meetings of Families and intend to participate in this one too. I certainly hope that a group of South Africans will be participating and also that through this FAMILY MATTERS newsletter we could network with others who are intending to go.  

SA CONSTITUTIONAL COURT RULING ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE IN SOUTH AFRICA

Some insights into the current state of affairs.  For the comprehensive media summary see www.constitutionalcourt.org.za.   For further information see www.marriagealliancesa.com and http://groups.yahoo.com/group/christianview/

From Christian View of 2nd December:
The Constitutional Court, yesterday, 1 December 2005, handed down its judgment in the matter shortly referred to as "the same-sex marriage case". The Court ruled that the Common Law and the Marriage Act 25 of 1961 was unconstitutional insofar as they exclude gay and lesbians from concluding marriages and ordered that the act be amended or alternative legislation put in place to protect the relationships of same-sex couples.
However, the Court has suspended its order for a period of 12 months and referred the matter to Parliament to afford it the opportunity to remedy the defect.  Failing this the Marriage Act will be amended by the addition of the words 'or spouse', in the marriage formula.  This would effectively
place same-sex unions in the same category as heterosexual marriage. The Court has set aside the order of the Supreme Court of Appeal.
Christian View’s response to this is:  “Court decision an outrage against marriage and democracy.
The instruction from the Constitutional Court for parliament to change the law to allow homosexual marriage represents an affront to democracy and an outrage against marriage.” 
In a subsequent release Christian View promotes changing the Constitution in order to protect marriage as between heterosexuals and urges citizens in the strongest citizens to write to the press and lobby their Members of Parliament.  Parliament is the place for the people and should reflect the people’s wishes.    

Response from the Marriage Alliance of SA
The Marriage Alliance of South Africa recognises the legality of the  Constitutional Court, registers the present judgement and acknowledges the Constitutional Court's endeavours to recognise other sectors of society, especially the Religious groups. It does not impose on religious groups an
obligation to celebrate or recognise same-sex unions.  The MASA appreciates the court's affirmation that religious opposition to same-sex marriage cannot be equated with racism or bigotry. We endorse and support the Courts referral of the matter to Parliament and thereby placing the final responsibility for the outcome on civil society and the people of South Africa.
Conclusion YOUR VOICE MATTERS!
The Marriage Alliance represents some 24 million South Africans from a wide  spectrum of Christian church denominations and organizations.  Partners to the Alliance have reaffirmed their belief that marriage is a heterosexual  institution and that it is universally recognized as a male female relationship that cannot be defined otherwise.
It is the intention of the Marriage Alliance actively to engage in the parliamentary process by making submissions to the Portfolio Committee of Home Affairs and by responding to the Report of South African Law Reform Commission. In addition there is the need to mobilize civil society, irrespective of political or religious affiliation, to lobby local and national members of Parliament and to give expression to their views in order to protect marriage as the union of one man and one woman since that is the best basis for the future citizens of South Africa.
The Marriage Alliance calls upon all citizens of South Africa to get pro-actively involved from an informed position in the forthcoming parliamentary struggle.

MEDIA RELEASE FROM CARDINAL NAPIER, PRESIDENT SA CATHOLIC BISHOPS’ CONFERENCE  
Cardinal Napier, on behalf of the Southern African Catholic Bishops Conference, reiterated the Church’s teaching as laid out in the Catechism of the Catholic Church #2357 that homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered and contrary to natural law. 
Among questions being asked about the Church’s reaction to the Constitutional Court’s ruling are the following: 
1. Can the Church impose its values on society?  The answer depends on a number of considerations:

1. If human beings do not have a Creator, in other words, if human beings have total knowledge, wisdom and power to create themselves, then the answer is No. The Church cannot impose its values on anyone, because the Church takes its authority from the infinite God.
2. If the Church and Society believe and accept as a given that there is an all holy, all knowing and all powerful God who created everything including human beings, and created them to exist and live according to his Will and Laws, then the Church not only can but also must proclaim and work for the acceptance and submission to the values that God has revealed to us.

2. The Constitution is the supreme law of the land, so how can the Catholic Church take issue with it?
It is true that the Constitution is the supreme law of the land, but in order to be binding on the consciences of its citizens it must conform to the Law of God. And in this case it clearly does not. Indeed if the S.A. Constitution is being made to supersede the revealed will of God then South Africa is morally doomed. For no one can go against God’s Will and come away unscathed. The fact that same sex marriages are approved by the Constitutional Court, that does not make them morally right.  The Church has the prophetic duty to point out where the Constitution runs counter to the Commandments of God, our Maker’s Instructions which determine how human beings are to live good and moral lives.
c) What is the Church going to do about this situation?
Taking our lead from the Scriptures our first action is Prayer, prayer for a change of heart on the part of all who are responsible for flaunting God’s Law;
Second we will continue teaching and preaching the truth revealed by God’s Word about human sexuality and its proper use in marriage.
Thirdly we will mobilize the Faithful and all people of goodwill to work together to save our nation and country from the disasters that befall any people that turns its back on its God.
The legalizing of same sex marriages is doomed to have a morally deleterious effect on the institution of the family, traditionally defined as the permanent union between husband and wife.
+Wilfrid Cardinal Napier, OFM 

CONCLUSION.
The matters raised here are social concerns and as such issues of Structural Morality and Moral Regeneration in society. In addition the “battle for the soul” is each person’s concern.   
It is recognized that there is a radical homosexual agenda which fights tooth and nail for the “rights” of homosexual people.  Just like there is a radical agenda worldwide to promote abortion as a right.  These are questions of morality and justice with which we must engage. But will we?   
At the same time do we not need to ask, “Are we making a big issue of these matters that effect a minority without paying due attention to the formation and education and promotion of right beliefs and values? Are we creating an environment and providing the resources for building and strengthening marriage relationships? Have bishops issued pastoral letters on this aspect recently? Are all those many couples who are married according to traditional custom but not in church being encouraged and prepared for a sacramental marriage? What a difference that could make in our society? Studying and reflecting on the catechesis of the 5th World Meeting of Families and engaging actively in the 2006 Marriage Project of the SA Family Life Desk could be vehicles for responding to both these aspects.  The ride ahead into 2006 could be challenging and potentially enriching. I pray that it will not be unduly rough.

But this is Christmas, the silly season after all so, on a lighter note...

Christmas cheer:
Dad gave his daughter an untrained puppy for Christmas
An hour later, he found her in the kitchen, looking at a puddle in the centre of the floor. “Look Dad,” she said, “My pup runneth over!”

Getting ready for marriage?
Fikile took his girlfriend to the soccer. The young couple found seats in the crowded stadium and were watching the action. A substitute was put into the game. As he was running onto the field to take his position, the young man said to his girlfriend, "Take a good look at that guy. I expect him to be our best man next year."
His girlfriend snuggled closer, replying, "That's a unique proposal – but I accept!”