2009 FAMILY LIFE CALENDAR REFLECTIONS

THEME: MARRIAGE AND FAMILY GROWING TOGETHER

NOVEMBER : LOSS AND DEATH, THE END OF GROWTH

INTRODUCTION
It is in the nature of creation that growth cannot continue indefinitely. Every organism has a lifecycle and a limited life-span. Growth happens in particular ways, faster and more vital in early stages, reaching maturity and eventually declining and dying.  Although all loss and death are painful this natural cycle is easier to accept than premature sickness and death.
Christians believing in life after death derive comfort from this belief as they deal with death. Many other losses have to be dealt with too, loss of health, possessions, strength and power. The loss of a love relationship ending in divorce or separation is a growth process too.  Share how you have given and received understanding support in dealing with losses and the end of growth?

1st All Saints. On this great day the Church rejoices with all the saints, i.e. the “friends of God.”  Some are recognised formally through being beatified or canonised but 144 000 is a symbolic number symbolising the millions of those who have died before us throughout the ages.  African belief systems could include ancestors here too. As a family spend some time discussing saints, finding out more about some of them and even choosing special patron saints.     

2nd Commemoration of the Faithful Departed. On this day the focus is specifically on those who have died. We believe that after death they undergo a process of purification that we call purgatory but that they are ultimately united with God. The Church prays for all the faithful departed that are in this process. The question remains whether the marriage ends there. That can be considered a choice. We know that eternal life includes the  capacity to love and surely those who have died will continue to love those they loved before, with an even deeper, more God-like love. Those left behind have to grow through the time of bereavement.      

8th  32nd Sunday Year B. God in whom we trust.  Two of the readings speak of the great generosity of two poor widows, being willing to give even when they have very little. Think of the prayer of St Francis, “It is in giving that we receive.” Those who have suffered a great loss of any kind might not feel capable of giving just yet.  Be understanding and supportive of the process of grieving and where possible help the person to move forward, possibly to a point where they are able to help others in their pain. 

15th 33rd Sunday Year B. Eternal perfection to come.  The 2nd reading tells us that Christ’s sacrifice achieved eternal perfection for all those whom he is sanctifying. When we are dealing with a loss through death our belief in the reward of eternal life might be tested. With other losses we may also struggle not to lose hope. Pray for courage and faith for those who are coming to terms with a loss particularly in their marriage.

22nd Christ the King. This last Sunday of the year is a great celebration of final victory of Jesus Christ. He is universal king of all who are on the side of truth and listen to his voice.  His kingdom is one of truth and life, of holiness and grace, of justice, love and peace.  This is the vision to be held before us, especially at times when a loss seems to overwhelm us.  Pray for courage to deal with all the losses and to believe that growth and regrowth are still possible. 

29th 1st Sunday of Advent Year C. Our liberation from fear.  Fear prevents us human beings from behaving with integrity in our own relationships and in our dealings with others. Fear can also result in loss and prevent growth. How often are we afraid of being hurt or hurting one another as husband and wives and members of a family. Pray for a release from fear and growth in honesty and integrity this Advent.