• HOW MEN AND WOMEN PLAY?

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  Aug 1

  Can you play the game of work life harmony?

  Dr Gloria Marsay

  Hands up those of you who have achieved work/life balance? Are there any hands up? Did anybody feel a muscle tweak in your arm? Does that mean that you would like to achieve some ”balance”?
  “Work life balance” is a term that was constructed during the 1980’s in an attempt to refocus people who were pursuing corporate and financial success to the detriment of family, friends and leisure time. This notion of work life balance is a myth. It implies that if you are at work – you are not living and that when you are not living you are at work….sounds silly doesn’t it.
  Life is essential for work to happen and work is essential for life to happen. Work is part of life not separate from it. It’s not about the balance…..it’s about the harmony of doing everything that needs to be done in the most efficient way possible. So it makes better sense to talk about “work life harmony”
  In our lives we play a variety of different roles (mother, father, spouse, son, daughter, sister, brother, friend, employee) The trick is to get all these role players working in harmony towards one goal – the betterment of society.
  Society is made up of families. Therefore, taking care of the family within the community is perhaps the most important of all our roles. Pope John Paul ll (in Laborem Exercens) emphasizes that : “Work constitutes a foundation for the formation of family life……” and so we should see work as a tool which provides us with the ability to live in harmony with our families and our communities. Work should not interfere with relationships and family life, but rather enhance them.
  If we compare life to the game of soccer (guess we all know a lot about that game by now) then we can see ourselves as playing the role of referee. As ref, you have control of the game, but not of all aspects… There are some things over which you have no control, but need to know what to do about them when they happen.
  Play has changed a lot recently. Let’s focus on two important changes

  • More women are joining the workforce, which means greater demands on both parents to juggle roles. We are playing the same game in the same team
  • The ability to take work home means longer working hours, consequently boundaries between home and work are blurred

  The aim of “work life harmony” game is to be aware of all that is happening and to know when, where and how to play so that each person develops and can perform their best within the context of the needs of others, and in relation to others. Furthermore, maintaining “work life harmony” allows us to rest and recharge our batteries, so that we are able to enjoy and live a more abundant life, contributing to our own well being, to the well being of those around us, and to the well being of our environment. This aim is explained to us by Pope John Paul ll. In the opening paragraph of his document Laborem Exercens, he writes:
  Through work man must earn his daily bread and contribute to the continual advance of science and technology and, above all, to elevating unceasingly the cultural and moral life of the society within which he lives in community with those who belong to the same family.
  Playing the game right is not only for the good of the individual, but it is necessary for the good of our families, our communities and society as a whole. The game of life incorporates all that we do, everyday of our lives: what we do to earn a living; what we do to keep ourselves alive (eat, sleep, pray, rest, reflect) what we do to help others (our spouses, our families, our community) and what we do to help our environment.
  Success in the work life harmony game, is a life that works!
  Be honest with yourself – take stock of how you have been spending your hours?
  How can you manage your time so that you are able to spend time with family and friends, and still have time over for rest!
  Here are some strategies for success.

  • Work is important and life relationships are equally important. Turn off the cell phone when you are spending time with family and friends. You would turn off your cell phone in an important business meeting wouldn’t you? ….so, let voice mail take a message for you when you are in a family meeting.
  • Share responsibilities – forget about gender roles – they complicate the game…anyone should be able to play the ball at anytime. Do away with off sides! When playing any game you run with the ball if you get the opportunity. You wouldn’t think “I am not going to play the ball because it is your turn,” you let the whole team down with that attitude.
  • Plan ahead – make time for “being” together and “doing” together. If you don’t plan for it, it won’t happen.
  • Get back to basics – “break bread together” Eat dinner together as often as you can – around the same table.
  • Watch a favourite TV programme together, then TURN OFF THE TV AND TALK TO EACH OTHER. Talk about the programme. Share experiences of the day….this is precious time which cannot be replaced by anything that you can buy.
  • Exercise together – play spot, go on a hike, for a walk around the block, ride bicycles, dance…….
  • Play with children – yours and others. Create family rituals that suit all of you… be consistent and have fun.
  • Grow a family veggie patch. Children learn so much about life when they learn to “forage”
  • Do something for the community together.

  Can you think of any other ideas that may work for you and your family?
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